Not all it was cracked up to be eh?

To preface my latest blog I'm going to attempt to not be too obvious when I make referrals to people close to me whose experience I will use as references to this rant. So to all those who find themselves thinking "he's talking about me" well I can neither confirm nor deny the accusation.

Two of my best friends of all time are divorced. Growing up there were few things that I was taught that were supposedly worse than the Big D, however I will definitely say now there are far worse things than the Big D. Here is an example of a paraphrased conversation I had with a girl i dated a little bit right after she had the Big D.
Me-so what's new?
Her-I got remarried to _____
Me-What?! are you serious? I thought you weren't in love with him anymore!
Her-Yeah... I mean we don't sleep together but I really care about him so the companionship is worth it.

So sometime in their life She is going to have to look Him in the face and say "yeah I'm married to you but there are other people I'd rather be with." What the hell is the matter with you people? If my wife came to me and wasn't in love with me I'd tell her to get the hell out of my house! I'm definitely one to accuse girls of being overly emotional and use their feelings to govern their actions over their logic, HOWEVER I still want some romance in my life. I want to be in love. Call it self respect or whatever but whoever I end up with is going to Love me to death! I was talking to one of my friends who has Big D'ed and we were discussing his happiness level. He went on and on about how difficult it was to do it initially but afterwards the weight that was lifted off his shoulders was incredible. If things suck then get the hell out. Hopefully you'll never have to choose between being in love and being happy cause they should always co inside but if that ends up being the case don't be miserable... Imagine how the other person would feel if you were honest and said "you make me miserable" they'd want out too! Do the right thing. Not just in marriage but in relationships too.

Now there are probably a few people who think "don't say that work through it blah blah blah" I personally can name a couple relationships I've been in that have been pretty much effortless. My High school sweetheart and I had a ridiculously effortless relationship. I didn't have to try at all and we had a BLAST together. Just who we were and what we liked meshed pretty much flawlessly... now we're not together anymore obviously but the circumstances that separated us had nothing to do with that. There are over 6 billion people in the world. You think that there is only one person that could make you happy? That's asinine if you think that. I'm pretty much positive that there are people (not a person) out there that you could be in love with AND happy on a relative effortless level. Now there will always be things one person wants to do and the other not and all that but way too much pressure is put on people to have their lives figured out by 26. I HONESTLY thought I was a failure that I was 24 and not married. Now I really don't think I even want to entertain the idea of being married until I'm ready! There are way to many paths in my foreseeable future for me to bind myself to one based on expectations of others or fear of loneliness. I encourage all who read this to examine their own lives and relationships and make sure they don't' have to choose between happiness and love.